Awesum!

Of Mice & Men "Im Alive" Weekly Update Video #2

2011-09-23T14:34:00.000-05:00

NEW BLOG!!!!!!

2011-09-23T10:57:00.002-05:00

http://calebsrandom.blogspot.com/

Just like AWESUM but better and more posts!

awesome is big in japan

2010-12-10T12:54:00.002-06:00

u are screwed

2010-12-05T15:56:00.001-06:00

funny random pics

2010-12-05T15:50:00.000-06:00

vid of the year for sure

2010-12-03T11:17:00.001-06:00

all plugged up by Variety Pack from Eddie Grams on Vimeo.

gucci mane sucks balls

2010-12-02T10:38:00.001-06:00

2010-12-01T17:24:00.001-06:00

lets salsa

2010-11-30T14:21:00.001-06:00

jelouse? i am

2010-11-30T14:18:00.002-06:00

Terrible Tuesday: ride pow with your friends from YoBeat Magazine on Vimeo.

ride a bike

2010-11-22T20:07:00.002-06:00

vromen bitches

2010-11-19T11:45:00.001-06:00

Vroman Skateboards Welcomes Jonathan Scholz to the Team from VromanSkateboarding on Vimeo.

uncyclopedia

2010-11-18T10:20:00.000-06:00

“More Penis...”

~ Your Mom on being a slut

Undead Kingdom exists as a sort of limbo punishment for souls who masterbated too much during their mortal lives to be allowed to soil the sheets in heaven.

Einstein's Theory of Relativity

Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Incest?

head of the state!

2010-11-14T14:31:00.001-06:00

he will survive!

2010-11-14T14:29:00.001-06:00

i want this for Christmas!

2010-11-14T14:25:00.002-06:00

thats wats up

2010-11-10T13:13:00.001-06:00

YoBeat Congrats to Caleb Kitzerow, Winner of the Poachers X DVD! Thanks to everyone who entered.

snowmaking

2010-11-08T18:15:00.002-06:00

boreal

2010-11-03T20:48:00.001-05:00

bHappy Opening Weekend Boreal 2010 from bHappyFilms on Vimeo.

kael hill

2010-11-02T10:47:00.000-05:00

The Kael Hill Conundrum from updown magazine on Vimeo.

house of 1817 for life!

2010-10-31T19:51:00.001-05:00

House of 1817: The Movie from riley erickson on Vimeo.

bobby blumpkin also known as dylan alito

2010-10-31T19:41:00.001-05:00

ice rink time

2010-10-31T19:09:00.000-05:00

wtfwzjd?(What the fuck would zombie Jesus do)

2010-10-28T10:44:00.002-05:00

comment of the day thanks hillary

2010-10-27T19:23:00.001-05:00

hillary clinton on October 27th, 2010 at 4:57 pm:

i remember when anyone could get on yobeat…

another hammer filled part

2010-10-25T19:44:00.001-05:00

Dylan Thompson in "THE ARENA" from FODT/COLE TAYLOR on Vimeo.

now/here super post!

2010-10-24T21:25:00.000-05:00

madden

2010-10-24T17:21:00.000-05:00

TheBlackPigeon

2 hours ago

I hereby announce my intentions to pay tribute to SB Madden God's unique interpretation of the English language by including it in all aspects of my daily life.

Let's just say that my boss at work will know that I am willing to place the team upon my back at the end of the day, as well as fun facts about Darren Sharper.

ovechkinfan74

1 hour ago

86 people got fucked by gumby

gingers have souls

2010-10-23T14:43:00.001-05:00

harrison gordon full part from javier fernandez on Vimeo.

this penis is for the girls

2010-10-22T13:20:00.000-05:00

EVIL BOY (official) from Die Antwoord on Vimeo.

best comments

SP3KTR 15 days ago
Your Art direction is the witches tit$, I think you could have had more Monster dicks up in this though
coxy 14 days ago
I really hope this is how you speak IRL. And when you're 70.
SP3KTR 14 days ago
I am 70
- David Horbach 14 days ago
  Krank! :-D
- Reply to this comment
  
  BIGDOGjohn 5 days ago
  ZEF NEXT LEVEL SHIT!!! Nuff said.

hunt high

2010-10-22T13:12:00.000-05:00

best comments

DEATHSxASSASIN

18 hours ago

@heydanbud Ok, so there is an over population of humans right? They are more harmful than any other thing. So why don't we replace deer with fat people???

TheTLTLHeadquarters

2 days ago 2

This is glorious for all the right reasons. Probably because I am masturbating high whilst watching.

yeah he is from wisco

2010-10-21T19:50:00.001-05:00

the wolf speaks

2010-10-21T14:51:00.001-05:00

riff raff is the best

2010-10-21T14:35:00.000-05:00

Lets Celebrate!

2010-10-20T16:57:00.000-05:00

the truth

2010-10-20T16:47:00.001-05:00

CUZ ELLIS SAID SO, BITCH

2010-10-13T23:11:00.002-05:00

"Any man that that plays a tamborine, is gay!" - J.E.

"Jack Nicholson?"
"Id fuck him" - J.E.

Jason ellis is a bad ass

2010-10-13T18:38:00.000-05:00

Bryce has mono... get well soon

2010-10-13T16:10:00.002-05:00

Mono

The deadly Christian strain of the mono virus.

Infectious Mononucleosis (also known as mono, the kissing disease, and dance fever) is a disease most commonly seen in humans and some mice. It is often characterized by a decrease in the body's resistance to monotheism. A person with mono is therefore called a monotheist and their thought may be impaired by their decrease or increase of the number of gods they worship to exactly one.

[edit]Symptoms

A person infected with mono will usually experience these symptoms 12 to 24 hours after being infected with the virus:

Extreme gullibility
Idol worship
Impotence
Moral conflicts
False hope

Depending on the particular strain of the virus the victim has (main strains include Judaism, Christianity, and Islam), he or she may also experience the following:

Unhealthy attachment to "Jesus" or "Muhammed"
Messiah withdrawl
May develop the dreaded "Bible Belt", a ring around the anus that hurts like the dickens!
Gay bashing

[edit]Causes

While the main cause of mono may never be known, scientists have postulated that mono is the result of general stupidity. "Generally, people with a higher rate of stupidity are the most at risk of contracting mono...", say expert scientists. Priests, on the other hand, stipulate that mono results from the influence of two parents who also have the disease or constant attendance at your local brainwashing house of worship. People using Linux are to avoid mono-infected applications like F-Spot, Tomboy, and GNOME Do.

bloggin sucks

2010-10-13T16:07:00.000-05:00

“Under the right circumstances, I would read your journal again. For example to evade terrorist gunfire in foreign climes, in a poorly lit simmering internet cafe with battered, cumudegeonly keyboards, dust fettered terminals being the lonely surviving articles. Possibly in a time of confusion due to the loss of a family pet” ”
~ Oscar Wilde on blogs

“Some scientists have claimed that blogging can cause cancer and strokes because the body "needed social contact" in the past. The body needed the appendix back then too, and all it does now is explode and kill you!”
~ Oscar Wilde on blogs

The blog is an important and recently introduced aspect of the much-lauded "Care in the Community" treatment for the mentally-handicapped. Mental patients (from the schizophrenic [1]to the learning-disabled [2] to the just plain weird) are invited to express their fears, suspicions, experiences and cravings by means of one of these occasionally-updated internet logs. The use of blogs as a general source of information and entertainment by a surprising number of Internet-users is therefore discouraged.

Downtown throw down bitch!

2010-10-13T15:57:00.000-05:00

2010 Downtown Throwdown Seattle, Washington from YoBeat Magazine on Vimeo.

I just want to party

2010-08-03T11:15:00.001-05:00

Terrible Tuesday: Mt. Hood Party!!!! from Pat Fenelon on Vimeo.

coc!

2010-07-18T01:50:00.001-05:00

The Camp Of Champions - "Snowboard Camp C 2010" from Camp of Champions on Vimeo.

zombies and snowboarding wat is better?

2010-07-08T14:56:00.001-05:00

Dangerzone Season 2 Episode 22 - "Dead Shred" from Nick Visconti on Vimeo.

best summer edit yet!

2010-07-05T14:47:00.001-05:00

The Camp Of Champions - ''Snowboard Camp A 2010" from Camp of Champions on Vimeo.

videograss is the best!

2010-06-29T20:27:00.002-05:00

BON VOYAGE TEASER from VIDEOGRASS on Vimeo.

lol!

2010-06-21T13:32:00.001-05:00

Wisconsin Diaper Thief Gets Off Easy

Dillon Makuski, a 20-year-old diaper fetishist, was given 30 months probation, 200 hours of community service, and must undergo a psycho-sexual examination for stealing dirty diapers from someone's home. He was arrested with six soiled diapers in his pockets.

The Stevens Point Journal reports that Makuski entered the home because he enjoys wearing diapers and he had no luck perusing the trash cans outside.

Assistant District Attorney Veronica Isherwood said her biggest concern with the case was the motive behind Makuski going into a home searching for diapers, and his lack of answers to investigators.
"But that just indicates to me the need for help," Isherwood said.

The judge in the case, Portage County Circuit Court Judge Frederic Fleishauer, ordered Makuski to get help without serving jail time, saying, "I don't think your circumstance has demonstrated that need."

[Image via AP]

Send an email to Jeff Neumann, the author of this post, at jeff@gawker.com.

go skateboarding day!

2010-06-21T13:22:00.001-05:00

kicked in the nuts!

2010-06-19T17:30:00.002-05:00

FTP!

2010-06-18T20:07:00.002-05:00

rad

2010-06-14T13:58:00.001-05:00

wild style

2010-06-09T17:22:00.002-05:00

My part for the year

2010-06-04T11:49:00.001-05:00

cuz todd said so, bitch

2010-06-04T01:22:00.001-05:00

"i may have bieber fever...or gonorrhea either way it burns when i pee"about 6 hours ago via web

whats your bracket?

2010-05-24T14:17:00.000-05:00

YOUR PICKS:

--

ROUND ONE WINNERS
CHRIS COLE
JOHNNY LAYTON
SHANE O'NEILL
ERIC KOSTON
CESAR FERNANDEZ
PJ LADD
CORY KENNEDY
ERIK ELLINGTON
MIKE MO CAPALDI
MARK APPLEYARD
MARC JOHNSON
TOREY PUDWILL
PAUL RODRIGUEZ
DENNIS BUSENITZ
BILLY MARKS
HEATH KIRCHART

--

ROUND TWO WINNERS
CHRIS COLE
SHANE O'NEILL
PJ LADD
CORY KENNEDY
MIKE MO CAPALDI
TOREY PUDWILL
PAUL RODRIGUEZ
BILLY MARKS

--

ROUND THREE WINNERS
CHRIS COLE
CORY KENNEDY
MIKE MO CAPALDI
PAUL RODRIGUEZ

--

SEMI FINALS WINNERS
CHRIS COLE
MIKE MO CAPALDI

--

THIRD PLACE RUNNER UP
CORY KENNEDY

--

WINNER
CHRIS COLE

tim and eric do skateing

2010-05-24T02:14:00.001-05:00

Tim and Eric - Roger of the Month Mar 2010 - Outro Video from Roger Skateboards on Vimeo.

skiing nuff said

2010-05-23T13:26:00.000-05:00

this is a song that will make you bleed thru your anus

2010-05-18T10:58:00.001-05:00

birds birds maine

2010-05-18T09:48:00.001-05:00

BIRDgang from FOOTYfiend.com on Vimeo.

2010-05-17T17:03:00.001-05:00

toilet paper is awesum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-05-17T10:57:00.001-05:00

insane

2010-05-16T13:44:00.001-05:00

2010-05-16T00:58:00.001-05:00

dat purple stuff mane

2010-05-13T20:58:00.001-05:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsoMVxtKlGM&feature=player_embedded#!

shred for shane

2010-05-13T16:16:00.000-05:00

thats right!

2010-05-12T21:31:00.001-05:00

Caleb and Jesus Joseph Chirst are now friends. · Comment · Like

Nick Taylor: wakeskaaaaate!

2010-05-12T20:08:00.001-05:00

☆KIM TV☆ Nick Taylor @ CWC from 21Rope.co.kr on Vimeo.

American Badass

2010-05-12T10:14:00.002-05:00

Skate 3 intro

2010-05-11T18:11:00.001-05:00

gooner

2010-05-11T10:58:00.001-05:00

Menthol Monday #6 from jakedurham on Vimeo.

Urban dictionary Tuesday

2010-05-11T10:45:00.000-05:00

Textual Satisfaction
MAY 11
625 up, 218 down
buy textual satisfaction mugs, tshirts and magnets
The feeling you get when your phone has a new message/missed call.
"dude I've been having textual satisfaction all day I already have 5 new messages."

Awesum!

2010-05-10T22:22:00.000-05:00

86 part deuce

2010-05-09T23:07:00.001-05:00

86: my new favorite snowboarder from Terence on Vimeo.

86!

2010-05-06T11:59:00.002-05:00

86 Boss of all Bosses from Mark Dangler on Vimeo.

Cinco de Mayonnaise

2010-05-05T18:28:00.001-05:00

El Cinco de Mayo is a national holiday in Mexico. It celebrates the prostitution of Mexican women board game players against France in a long, drawn-out game of Risk™.
Cinco de Mayo has become a well-known Mexican festival where participants consume 5 jars of mayonnaise. It is generally celebrated on the sacred holiday of "El Día Para Limpiar El Refrigerador", whose date and frequency varies widely from region to region, and indeed, from household to household.

damn son

2010-05-05T18:27:00.001-05:00

so much spins

2010-05-04T21:47:00.001-05:00

2010-05-04T21:14:00.001-05:00

i just want to eat you out

2010-05-04T17:23:00.000-05:00

tgif

2010-04-30T17:59:00.000-05:00

pete wast! holy god

2010-04-29T12:58:00.002-05:00

The Pete Wast Interview from IAN MACY on Vimeo.

the vid that started it all

hottest surfer

2010-04-29T11:43:00.000-05:00

ALANA BLANCHARD from Jon Hechtkopf on Vimeo.

intergalactic

2010-04-29T10:09:00.001-05:00

The Camp Of Champions - The Handrail 2009 from Camp of Champions on Vimeo.

i heart snow!

2010-04-29T10:03:00.000-05:00

The Peace Process Teaser 2 from ian post on Vimeo.

story of my life

2010-04-29T00:23:00.001-05:00

snowboarding explained

2010-04-27T20:15:00.001-05:00

Snowboard
(Redirected from Snowboarding)

FACTS DETECTED
It's funny 'cuz it's true.
A snowboard is a skateboard that is missing its wheels. It was invented by Tim Burton (Canadian) after he decided that the spoiled, angsty children of rich, WASP skiers should have a way to make themselves feel rebellious. He turned immediately to the skateboard, which had had this exact effect on the spoiled children of rich, WASP suburbanites.
Burton went to his garage and took out a skateboard that he had left from his spoiled, angsty teenage years. He took a screwdriver and removed the wheels, then transported the new device to a ski resort. He tried it out, and was immediately kicked off the mountain by the ski patrol. Having established that the snowboard could indeed make rich WASPs/n00bs feel that the man had gotten them down, Burton realized that he would be able to market his idea.
Ten years later, Burton's idea is a success. The spoiled, angsty children of rich, WASP skiers of today genuinely believe that the man has got them down. They buy $300,000 snowboard suits to express this.
Snowboarding, as the practice of descending a mountain on a snowboard is now called, is now an Olympic sport. But the verb meaning "to descend a mountain on a snowboard" is "to ride" and the athlete a "rider." Top American etymologists are currently investigating this phenomenon. As expected, they have no clue.
In the 2006 Olympics, snowboarder...shit...rider Lindsey Jacobellis was widely criticized for trying to pull a method air on the way to the finish line in the innagural Olympic snowboardcross. She fell and finished second, leading a bunch of American sportswriters to climax as they imagined writing their reports on the subject. Jacobellis, for her part, said that the man had gotten her pants down, and hurried off for the shooting of her latest VISA commercial.
Jacobellis' showing contrasts greatly with the performance of Shaun Weasley, also known as The Flying Tomato by the Italian press. As the brother of Ron Weasley and Sauron Weasley, it is uncertain if The Force or any other hokey religions were employed to aid Shaun's performance. Sportswriter Han Solo remains a vocal skeptic of those levelling accusations to White, stating in an article that "hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side."
Of course, this has landed Mr. Solo in hot water, as there are now those who claim he advocates the Tanya Harding Methodology for Sports Advancement, and police are now investigating as to whether or not Han shot first.
In other news involving the advancement of snowboard riding's popularity, we have a word with world-class snowboarder extraordinaire, Michael Damyanovich:
"Yeah man, snow is dope. So is riding. Man, I am sooo stoked. Sick." Teylor Thomasson is a pro snowboarder that lives in Canada.
snowboarding is also Canada`s pastime. Canadians like to slide down the hill while completely high on there cheap, good weed. should tell you enough.

Urban dictionary Tuesday

2010-04-27T20:12:00.000-05:00

lol right?
APRIL 23
1411 up, 3717 down
buy lol right? mugs, tshirts and magnets
1. Declaring that something is funny and asking if others agree with you. Usually used in a sarcastic or obvious manner.
Check out that duck taking a shit. lol, right?
by huxtible jones share this

damn deer

2010-04-27T18:14:00.000-05:00

party?

2010-04-27T10:43:00.001-05:00

Grenade Games 6 - Grande Finale from monster canada on Vimeo.

im a celebrity bitch!

2010-04-26T18:52:00.000-05:00

vid part mane

2010-04-23T08:48:00.001-05:00

09-10 Snowboarding part from Caleb Kitzerow on Vimeo.

complements of yobeat

2010-04-22T19:36:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, United States President Barack Obama welcomed the US Olympic Snowboarding Team to his home. The job of translating bro talk, navigating cultural differences and documenting the event was given to Yobeat. Out of respect for this historic moment Yobeat has decided to publish our account almost completely unedited. Any and all editing was strictly saved for increased readability and information facilitation.

After arriving in Washington D.C. the group headed to President Obama’s home. A brief security check awaited us. Once cleared of bombs, guns, anthrax, knives, bombs again and finally any bottled liquid or gel containing more than 3.4 ounces we were given a green light to proceed. Once past White House security eight Olympic snowboarders were ushered past a small army of well dressed heavily armed men. Scotty Lago liked their weapons—fully automatic machine guns and pistols of a high enough caliber to cave your chest in. Nate Holland, who wore a superman suit, took this opportunity to be a jackass, “You call that a gun?” The group winced, hoping the cyborg-esque man before us had not noticed. He had, “I will end you.”

While waiting for the arrival of a ninth Olympian we were given a tour. Elena Hight loved the tapestry of the dining hall, but kept her head down after being scolded for touching. Kelly Clark was also given a warning after blowing her nose into Eleanor Roosevelt’s handcrafted table cloth. This led to a heavier surveillance for the remainder of the tour. The next 23 minutes were painfully quiet, the only sounds coming from the clicking and clanking of Louie Vito’s chains.

Our first peak of the President came when he came through the front door, “Goodbye Michael Jordan, Lebron James and Jesus.” The President, dripping with sweat and in athletic apparel, was caught off guard by our presence, “Hello, who are you people?” Nate Holland opened his mouth but was quickly throat punched by the Secret Service officer he had previously insulted. Louie Vito spoke, “Obama, we are the Olympic Snowboarding Team. We are supposed to meet you today.” The President eyed a guard, “Do not call me Obama. Now, I just finished a game of hoops, excuse me.” Everyone stood awkwardly except for Nate Holland, he was unconscious.

Nate Holland really wants to be the fastest boarder on earth.

A well dressed, freshly showered President returned moments later. With the help of 37 aides we were given a serious once over. “I was not aware you would all be here. I only wanted the Flying Potato. Where is he?” Silence ensued. “Fine, to the Oval Office.” Lindsey Jacobellis took off running for the door, and the group pursued. Lindsey fell just before the door. The rest of the group past her as she lay crying in the hallway.

Things began to relax inside the Oval Office. Much of the group stared at historic relics, photographs and books while the President searched through a trunk. “So, what do you guys think, of my new Health Care bill?” Everyone agreed it was good, except Nate Holland. “That Shi…” came out of his mouth, and again he was knocked unconscious. The cyborg-esque man almost grinned. The President turned to face us, having found what he was looking for, “Now, does anyone want to play dominos, while we wait for the Potato?” Louie Vito looked up excitedly and backflipped off the couch, “Obamms’ I got you on dominos.” “Do not call me Obamms’.” “Sorry.”

Domino’s were played. Louie Vito was the Presidents only competition. “You have some skills, but can you land a backflip off my desk?” In less than a second Louie was standing on the leader of the free world’s desk, “Check it out Barack!” “Do not call me Barack.” Then Louie flung his head back and leapt. “Wow, incredible, what do you call that?” “Double Cork 1260.” “I have a trick of my own.” “Do it O-man!” “Do not call me O-man, and DOMINOS MOTHER FUCKER!”

Walkie-Talkies began to make noise. “Code Pink, second story kitchen counter.” Three men, guns in hand, sprinted out of the room. I realized Scotty Lago was no longer with the group. “My main man O, what’s a Code Pink.” “Do not call me your main man O.” The President looked to his aide, “When will the Potato be here.” Running could be heard upstairs. And then downstairs. And then in what sounded like the wall until a trap door burst open. Scotty Lago had rejoined the group. Resting against the trap door he caught his breath, “Oh hey guys. Great secret tunnels Mr. President, what’s everyone doing?” The President looked sternly in Scotty’s direction, “Code Pink?” Scotty made the “not me” face. The President winked at Scotty, “Call off the Code Pink.” The Oval Office was then bombarded by men, each with an orange wrist band. Four men in suits followed, single file, through the front door while three others, dressed for urban combat crashed through the windows. Aides shrieked, the Secret Service had been disarmed and the President pounded down on his desk, “What the fuck! Michelle will kill me over those windows. Who are you people? Do you have the Potato?” A man, followed by three more men, answered, “Calm down Mr. President, we are Shaun’s people, this is a simple security sweep ensuring Shaun’s safety.” “Oh, well fine, sweep away, and where did you get your guys?”

Scotty Lago and a maid running from well dressed men with guns.

“All clear.” Boom! The door flew open, a red carpet rolled in through the open doorway, a constant flashing bulb sent Nate Holland into a seizure while Led Zeppelin deafened the rest of us. A blur of red slid through the smoke and down the red carpet. After a moment of air guitar Shaun White stood up, “Obama my man! Sorry I was late. Got hung up in Europe ‘cuz of that volcano thang. All good though. My old pal Richard Branson hooked up a space flight and we just skipped the pond man.” The music began to fade as the fog cleared. The red carpet and Shaun’s people had vanished, also; the windows were fixed.

“So B-man, I caught up with Jesus and Jordan at SuperStarbucks. They say you schooled ‘em, nice work.” The slap of a high-five could almost be heard, but ears were still ringing. Their conversation continued. The rest of us regained our balance, and began to take our seats. Tension in the room was growing. Kelly Clark was visibly upset, “I have Gold medals too! Why is Shaun so special?” Greg Bretz spoke up, “What? You’re not Ross Powers or Gian Simmen.” Vito fell over in laughter. Gretchen whispered to Greg, “That’s Kelly Clark, she’s a chick.” “No fucking way.”

Hate Shaun White all you want. He’s still having more fun that you’ll ever have.

Joe Biden and some other politicians entered the room. “B-man, we heard the Potato is here!” “Joe, I’m sorry, Shaun has not arrived yet.” “Shit really? We just bailed on Congress for this.” “Gotcha!” Shaun pops up from behind the desk, “Biden, other old white dudes! What’s good bros?” More talking ensues, and everyone sits down. I hear the President mention Code Pink. A roar of laughter and high-fives ensue, and Scotty is asked to join Shaun and our leaders. I take a pee.

The soap made my hands smell funny, and there was a condom in the waste basket. I find the wrapper, it’s a Scotty Lago edition, made by Rockstar Energy Drink. I leave the bathroom.

Vito had now joined the popular table. Nate Holland’s blood began to boil, “I’m the fastest ripper in the world. How could they not wanna’ hang with me! Fuck it, I’m going over. Yo dudes, did I ever tell you about the time I was going really fast?” Something wizzed by my face. Nate, having only taken two steps, hit the ground face first. A small dart was protruding from his neck. The President looked at an air duct, “Thanks Tom.” Nate was dragged off, not to be seen again.

The rest of us sat in relative silence. Elena had fallen asleep. Lindsey tended to her wounds. Rug burn. Earlier, she had tried to show off like Shaun, but her showboating ended in pain. Greg sat in disbelief, still starring wide eyed, directly at Kelly. An aide walked over, “Hi guys. So we need to wrap this up, but as a token of the President’s appreciation for representing our country in the 2010 Winter Olympic Games we are presenting you with not only these coupons for half off your cab fare, but these buy-one get-one passes to ESPN Zone, located just downtown.” The group looked astonished. Greg scooped up his prize, “Fuck yeah ESPN Zone, let’s do this!” I looked at the woman, “Media, can’t leave, have to observe, sorry.” “Oh, are you a new aide?” “No.” “With CNN?” “No.” “You’re with who exactly?” “Yobeat. I’m here to observe, translate and educate.” “I’ve never heard of Yobeat.” “You’re not alone.” And with that I was allowed to stay.

Meeting the President is a big deal. Gretchen did all she could to impress.

I sat back, listening for quotes, “So Louie, let’s see your medal.” “Oh, I actually came in 5th place but.” “Get the fuck out.” Mid-sentence Biden had cut Vito off, I did not see Vito again. I kept listening. “So, Code Pink huh? That’s great work Scotty. Brings me back to the ‘90s with Wild Bill.” A tap on the door interrupted the flow of conversation. Gretchen Bleiler entered the room. The Vice President stood up, “Look, we’re really sorry but Shaun told us girl snowboarding didn’t matter, and this is kinda like man time.” Gretchen slipped off her coat. Biden’s jaw dropped,“But you know what, this country needs change, and it deserves change, so by god, let’s work together and hang up that coat.” Gretchen was back, but with no available chairs she was forced to stand. She stood there indefinitely, silent and awkward. She had become political eye candy, and the boys club carried on.

The President stood up, “Well fellow Americans, how do we feel about dinner?” Shaun whipped out his Blacker Than Black card, winked and whispered in the ear of an assistant. I have no idea where she came from. A moment later the chandelier began to rattle. “So hey, my boys Richard Branson and Steve Jobs are hovering outside in Rich’s new fighter jet. How about we pile in and grab some grub in China? I know this great place.” Biden interrupts, “The place with the tigers?” “You’ve been? Awesome! So you in?” Scotty scratches his head. I read his lips, “What the fuck?” The President stood up, “Shaun White, I don’t really like China, but I’ll make an exception for you.” The group headed towards the hallway. The President wrapped his arm around Shaun, “So Shaun White, why do they call you the Potato?”

As the chandelier shook for a second time an aide entered the room, “Do you need anything else? The President has instructed me to help you in any way that I can.” I asked if Yobeat could have a bailout package. She starred back blankly. “I’m ready for my coupon to ESPN Zone now.” As I looked around the Oval Office for a final time two men entered. They picked up Gretchen. She had a dart in her neck.

Awesum

2010-04-22T10:59:00.001-05:00

pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!pete wast!

2010-04-21T21:07:00.000-05:00

A Moment with... Pete Wast from Ian Macy on Vimeo.

bang it all over your head

2010-04-21T10:28:00.001-05:00

BACK TO THE BONEYARD teaser 2 from The BANG SHOW from The Bang Show on Vimeo.

facebook battle

2010-04-20T10:17:00.001-05:00

Facebook vs Helgasons.com from www.helgasons.com on Vimeo.

Urban dictionary Tuesday

2010-04-20T09:54:00.001-05:00

marijuana minute
APRIL 20
464 up, 267 down
buy marijuana minute mugs, tshirts and magnets
A seemingly long period of time. It occurs most often when under the influence of marijuana due to the altered state of mind. An actually short moment may seem to drag on forever.
Similar to: New York Minute
Dude, that speech lasted a marijuana minute.
-Charlie

I know, I kept wondering if it was going to ever end
-Michael

How long have you been waiting to finally have sex with your girlfriend?
Guy #1

I don't know man. It's been a marijuana minute.
Guy #2

happy pot day!

My new workout routine

2010-04-19T20:10:00.000-05:00

sheckler jiggalo for life

2010-04-19T16:03:00.001-05:00

damn.

2010-04-19T11:44:00.001-05:00

Landscape Altered - Episode 1 from Kai Neville on Vimeo.